Teen Relationships

Taking Teen Relationships Seriously

Even though some adults consider teen relationships only child-play and something that the teen will soon get over, these relationships should be taken more seriously.

It is during our adolescent years that we begin to form the foundations for all future relationships.

Partner choices during adolescents are an important part of the developmental process. During these formative years teens choice of mates and friends shape their thinking and future interactions.

With the increase in violence in the world today, it’s no surprise that not all teen relationships are fun and happy.

An increased number of adolescent relationships are problematic and even violent.
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Take for example one teen couple I worked with, Tammy and Walter (name changed to protect the innocent).

After giving a presentation at an urban high school on effective communication techniques, a 14-year old freshman came to the podium to talk to me about her relationship with her 16-year old boyfriend, Walter.

Walter was a junior at the time. Tammy visited my temporary office in school the following week. She explained that Walter was normally a “nice guy” but when they had a disagreement he would yell and scream at her. The screaming would get so out of control that they would go for days without talking.

Tammy really cares for Walter and wanted to know how she can talk with Walter without getting him “so mad”.

When working with adolescents I always address their concerns in the same respectful and understanding manner as I would an adult relationship.

Teens normally get advice from their uninformed friends since they fear going to their parents. Knowing that ages 14 and 16 are formative years for both Tammy and Walter I felt that it was important that I worked with them for one hour a week over the next eight weeks.

The fact that I was able to pull them out of class helped my attendance rate.

Throughout our time together Tammy and Walter were able to practice alternative ways of communicating using various techniques that I taught them.

A follow-up survey showed that Tammy and Walter made great progress in their ability to communicate with one another through their dedication and hard work during their relationship coaching sessions.

Teen Abstinence -The Beginning of Relationship Trust

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